"Payless" in Ithaca

ONE CENT: Dear Payless,

This is a tough question, because we certainly want to raise our children so they don’t bow to peer pressure, but at the same time be aware their comfort in school is also important.  Perhaps a conversation about what exactly your daughter would like is in order.  If one or two items would make things better for her, is there the possibility she could earn the money by doing odd jobs around the house?  In doing so, she can learn a great lesson about hard work AND the ephemeral nature of trendy clothing.

TWO CENT: Oh, Payless, I had the ugliest red Santa-Clause-looking coat that I wore to school every day during the winter.  During the summer, I wore clothes my mom lovingly made – complete with my name written in cursive on the pocket of denim jeans.  My “friends” mocked me relentlessly over my uncool clothes, although – in retrospect – they weren’t as hideous as my peers made them out to be. Truth be told, I cried over the clothes and the treatment, but it made me identify with the poorer kids everyone made fun of and it made me recognize the fickleness of my friends.  Although One Cent’s suggestions are good, look at this as a potential to teach her about your wealth compared to the rest of world (this is a helpful site).  In other words, don’t overlook the advantage of a little discomfort!  It’s clarifying, even for kids.